It's a Dog's Life

What a month! Whee! I'm an archeologist! I dug four new holes in the yard, just doing what Mom's always doing, but somehow she didn't seem all that happy about my digs.

Now she has scared the doggy poop out of me. She put up a gate that seems to open all by itself and close without warning! I hate changes, I tell you, I hate them. I was used to following Mom to the gate and sitting beside her while one of those big things on wheels came in or out. Now she does not even go outside for the gate to open! It's magic, I tell you, it's magic. Oh well, I'm just a dog and have no say in such matters. I'll just have to get used to it.

Even worse, Mom moved my bed. Yessiree. I was so happy with my little nook by the front door. But did I get to keep it? No-o-o-o. She moved this around and that around, those places where humans sit, you know, and in the end, she moved my bed. Now that I've had a few days to get used to it though I found out one really good thing about it: It's by the fire. H-m-m warm, so nice and warm.

Mom used to give some treats out of a red bag. They were crunchy and tasted good. Then she didn't have any of them left. I had eaten them all. She only gives them to me if I do what she says. On this time she went to the house and came back with really good-smelling goodies. She said it was "beef jerky," and she gave me a piece. Wow! My teeth are still tingling from all the chewing involved in that. I love it, gimme some more of it!

Mom had a lot of vistors this month. Some I liked right away, especially the ones that smelled like dogs. I didn't like the ones who just walked right in the door like they owned the joint, so I got my hackles up. Lucky for them they knew to stop in their tracks until Mom could take over the situation.

Yeah, and then Mom had company and served all this great-smelling food and didn't give me any, as usual. But, you know what I really like? Little mom likes some little puffy white things and always spills some on the floor. When no one is looking I troll the floor for the dropped pieces. Now I've figgered out when there will be some on the floor because I hear this Pop-Pop-Pop sound just before it's going to happen. Thank powers that be for small favors! I love it 'cuz Mom and Little Mom seem too stupid to know I'm snatching people food on the sly.

For some reason, Mom wants me to go running across the yard chasing a toy and then bring it back to her. Hmph. She throws a toy, and I can't resist chasing after it, but I'll be doggone before I'm going to bring it back to her. I want to play with it, chew on it a while. After all, it's mine, all mine! Well, one day, I came pretty close to her with the toy, and she grabbed it right out of my mouth. At first I was mad, but then she pulled a piece of that jerky stuff out of her pocket and told me what a good girl I am. That was SWELL! I think I'll start at least letting her take it out of my mouth. Well, maybe, maybe not.

My favorite thing is to harrass Little Mom. I go up to her while she's sitting in a chair and nudge her arm up and do it over and over. Pretty soon I get what I want, for her to rub my head and my belly and make me feel wonderful all over. She's such a sucker most times. On the other hand, sometimes she opens the door and says, "Outside. Outside. Now!" Oh well, I know my tactics will work another time.

A lady came over the other day to jabber with Mom. I really liked her. She was real friendly and smelled good to me. Mom invited her to sit down on a couch, and I was just so excited to see this woman that I jumped up on the sofa and made myself comfy with my head in her lap. Boy, oh boy! Mom hollered at me, telling me to get down! I was in trouble! But it turned out OK because when I hit the floor the lady leaned over and rubbed my belly. Hey, I know how to get what I want, don't I? Oh, well, a dog's life ain't too bad.